


there's a reason that london puts barriers on the rails

by orphan_account



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Clay | Dream - Freeform, Darryl Noveschosch - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sad Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, georgenotfound - Freeform, idk what to put here man, sapnap - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:42:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28085631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: title from "jubilee line" by wilbur sootnot set in london, just thought it was fitting lolbe mindful of the tags !this is a vent fic. do not romanticize this.lowercase intended.
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound/Darryl Noveschosch/Sapnap, Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound/Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 197





	there's a reason that london puts barriers on the rails

**Author's Note:**

> this is in an alt universe where dream, bad, george and sapnap all live near each other i guess lol

dream watches his breath billow in front of his eyes. his knuckles ache, painted white from how tight they're holding onto the metal rails, as if letting go for even a brief second would send him plummeting into the water beneath him. and it might—but that's what he wants, isn't it? a taunting breeze brushes the back of his neck, and he feels a wave of calm wash over him. it's odd. he feels more at peace—just a step away from his death—than he's felt in weeks.

he leans foward, eyes raking over the violent water below him, taunting him. it beckons to him. but he knows he has to wait. he needs to talk to george, to sapnap, to bad. he needs to say goodbye—they deserve that much. he won't—he _can't_ —mention what he's about to do. they would worry. they would go out looking for him. he can't let them do that—he's worried enough people already.

he holds his phone with one hand, the other still anchoring him to the railing. scrolling through his contacts, he adds them all to the same call. it's easier that way—to say every goodbye at once.

he hesitates for a moment before he presses call. his heart and breathing accelerate. he feels that calm from before vanish and he has to force himself to calm down. _calm down calm down calm down don't let them hear you like this calm down_.

"dream?" george's tired voice fills dream's ears. he probably woke him up. _don't tell them about—don't tell them what's going on_ "is something wrong?"

" _clay?_ "

dream shuts his eyes. his real—george never uses his real name. 

"clay, what's wrong?" sapnap, now.

"is everything okay?" bad, too. a sob nearly pushes its way past his lips. he hasn't cried in so long. even when he wants to—or feels like he should—everything is just sort of... numb. and now, with the taste of blood filling his mouth as he bites down on his lower lip and forces himself not cry in front of his friends, he almost prefers being numb.

"it's okay. i'm okay."

"where are you?" 

"you won't find me. it's okay."

"what are you doing?" george's voice is frantic now. the sleepiness has vanished. dream feels a pang in his chest. this is exactly what he _didn't_ want—to be worried about.

"i'm sorry," the quiet mantra begins, growing louder and louder "i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm—i need to go—i'm—i'll be okay—i'm sorry." he speaks between breaths that become more and more fraught. 

"no— _please_ —stay with us, clay." the sound of a door slamming. a car starting. bad isn't in his house anymore. 

"i love you guys—i need to go—i'm sorry—"

"we love you too. but i need you to stay on the line." 

dream hesitates. 

"where are you?" 

he shuts his eyes. a long silence sits over the call. 

"clay, are you still here?" 

"i'm here—i'm here, at lake underhill—" 

"i'm on my way. can you promise me you'll wait until i get there?" when dream doesn't respond, bad repeats more assertively "don't do anything reckless. promise me." 

"i—" he pauses "i don't know if i can." dreams rasps.

"clay, please." he's desperate "promise me."

"i promise." he gives in, but it's empty—he doesn't know if he'll actually be able to make it that long. he glances beneath him. _it would be so easy._

george and sapnap remain silent. like they want to add something, but don't know the right thing to say. like one wrong word could send dream over the edge—literally and metaphorically. dream doesn't blame them. he never knows what to say in situations like these, either.

"nick, george—go to dream's house. we'll meet you there." 

they don't say anything, but the sound of shuffling, then doors closing, can be heard.

dream firmly plants his shoes into the ground, making no effort to bring himself to safety. he looks up. pink, tangerine, and the beginning sprouts of blue paint the sky. it's pretty. dream tries to focus on that instead.

silence engulfs the call, until wheels screech on asphalt in something akin to agony. dream whips his head around. bad is already emerging from the driver door. dream doesn't move as bad sprints towards him, wrapping his arms around the younger from the opposite side of the rail.

"i'm—i'm here. we're gonna go, guys. we'll be there soon." 

bad helps dream over the railing. he doesn't let go of the younger's arm, as if doing so would result in dream running away and going through with his plan. he ushers him into the passenger seat, closing the door for him. dream stares out the window. by now, a blanket of night has begun to wash over the sky, painting it a light blue. he watches as colours blur together when he cars begins to move, bright street lights standing out from the blue.

"did you take anything?"

"what—like pills?"

bad nods.

"no—i—i was just planning on jumping."

the rest of the car ride remains silent. when they're at his house, his friend's cars are already parked in the driveway. he doesn't want to face them. not after all that.

he only gets out when bad makes him. he sits with his knees tucked against his chest, resting beneath his chin. they all watch him—scrutinize him. he wants to hide. he hates this.

"you—you fucking idiot—oh my god—" george tackles him in his arms. he returns the gesture. it's nice, being hugged.

"promise me—promise me you'll never do that again."

"i can't promise." 

" _promise me_ , please." 

"i don't want to make a promise i can't keep." 

george frowns, clearly unsatisfied with the answer, but he doesn't press further. dream's grateful for that. dream buries his head in the older's chest as he holds him tighter. 

the cushion beside them dips. then there's a hand on his back.

"i love you, brother. we're—we're all here for you, you know?" sapnap's voice cracks towards the ends, and dream feels a pang in his heart.

"i love you too—all of you." dream has a hard time believing that _they_ love _him_ , but he doesn't ponder on it for too long. sleepiness clouds his mind, the exhaustion beginning to tug on his eyelids. he doesn't fight to keep them open—and just lets himself fall asleep surrounded by people he loves.

**Author's Note:**

> lake underside in an actual bridge in orlando, though im not sure how close it is to where dream actually lives and i Highly doubt a fall from that height would result in death. just pretend it's a lot taller lol
> 
> also i hope it's not too noticeable i rushed the end


End file.
